b
**Says, People Don’t Know I’m a Prayer Warrior
It is no longer news that Lagos socialite, Bimbola Folawiyo, has packed out of her matrimonial home in Apapa, Lagos.
It is also no longer news that her marriage to Lagos big boy, Yomi Folawiyo, has ended and she has already filed for divorce.
But what you may not know is the real reasons she took the decision to part ways with the may she once loved with everything she had.
She spoke with City People magazine on the genesis of her problem with Yomi.
There is this rumour in town that you have moved out of your husband’s house. Is this true
It is no longer a rumour. That is the truth. I moved out 2 weeks ago when I saw efforts being made to frustrate me out of my home. My husband moved out months back, leaving me and my daughters. I have to move on. I have suffered enough I gave my husband a lot of time to see if he can come back and I also reached out to him but it was all a futile effort. I left when I saw that I didn’t see him coming back. I had to take my kids and leave.
How did your once happy marriage get to this pitiable state
It’s rather unfortunate that things could end up like this between Yomi and I. He is someone that I really love so much. He is someone that I want the best for. Even though we are not together anymore, I still want the best for him and pray that God will find him someone who will affect him for God and have patience with him. He moved out of the house 5 months ago without a word. But, two days before he left, he told me that he had offended me and I said how.
He said to me that his family called him and sat him down. I asked, your family? And he said Yes. He mentioned names, while he said they told him in a little meeting that they want him to write his Will. I asked him how old he is he that he will be writing a Will. I said what property do you have that you are writing a Will for. Though he usually gets a cheque twice, yearly and his family wanted to know who they would give his annual cheque to if anything happens to him.
He said he was so confused and wanted to write my name and my daughters’ name but the family were against this and they said why are you writing her name instead of the name of his ex and her son. He said he didn’t know what to do and he wrote the name of his ex-wife and her son. I asked if what he did was right. I remembered I told him to forget about me, but how can you have 2 children and you write only one when you ought to have written Ayomide and Mosunmola. He said he didn’t think it through till when he got home. HE SAID HE FELT BAD DOING THIS WHEN HE KNOWS THAT I, Bimbo was the one there for him in sickness when there was nobody.
When he was living in my own house, I didn’t see family members around him. I didn’t know what he did at home but he came to live with me for 10 months. He is been there for me just like I have been there for him as well. Even if I don’t deserve anything I believe that my daughter deserves something from her father. He started crying in the house and I was not the only one there. We had eye witness when he was telling me this. If he denies it I have prove.
I can call on people who served as eye witness. Anything I tell you I have proof. Let him come out of wherever he is because that is what he told me. At that point I said to myself, thank God I am working. It is not the Will that will decide what my daughter will become. I started crying in the middle of the conversation and he was crying as well that he will go back to the office and tell them he didn’t know what came to his mind that he wrote that.
Since then, I saw he was not comfortable around the house anymore. He came back one day and said his friends said why did he tell me such a sensitive issue and there is no woman he can tell that he will be happy. He started getting scared and I told him not to worry and he granted an interview with an on-line platform where he said he ran for his dear life. The only reason why I think Yomi left the house was because I am his saviour and many people run from their saviour so as not to get saved from the enemy. Yomi is someone that I love very much.
Lots of people say that I got married to him because of the money. I don’t understand why people will think like that. I am also from a very rich family. Money is not a problem in the family I come from.All that I achieved today is as a result of my father’s efforts, My mother and my uncle Bujuji Kashamu all assisted me in business.
Yomi can never say that he had assisted me in business. It is whatever he brings home that we manage, as his wife. It is not like he has a company or his own personal house. He works in his father, company. It is not like I have access to anything directly from him. It is not like I can walk into their company and say that I want this. Yomi has lied against me a lot. I don’t know why he is fond of lying. I have always loved my husband but i started getting worried when Yomi will go and take loans from people.
An instance was when he took loan from one Mr Femi Ajayi 3 years ago and he refused to pay back. Mr femi called me when I was in Dubai with my 2 daughters sympathising with me that I lost my daughters. His statement was “Epele Aunty,Emabinu pe mi pe yin , epele ti awon omoyin to ku“(Sorry I leant you lost your daughters).
I was mad and he said Uncle Yomi borrowed money from him stating that we lost our daughters and needed money to buy casket. I told him my daughters are not dead and I will never bury my daughters in Jesus name. He explained further. I got so scared. I was inside the Emirate Mall in Dubai when I received the call. Funny enough, we all came to Dubai with Yomi and I told my first daughter to speak with the Uncle Femi and she spoke to him saying “Hello Uncle“.
Femi was shocked and he said how can somebody lie with his children and I said, you know what, my husband can never tell you that. I told him we were in Dubai together that I will talk to my husband when I get back to the hotel since I was sure he won’t tell him something like that. I was bitter and couldn’t shop again. I met Yomi in the bathroom and told him I want to see him. I asked did he take any loan from Mr Femi Ajayi and he said Yes.
Who is Femi Ajayi
Mr Femi is like a junior friend of his. He is one of those “Asewo“(Money Charger) that hang around parties. I don’t know how they came around been friends. He usually calls me when Yomi takes a loan from him and he is not ready to pay. He confirmed that he collected loan from him. I also asked why he lied that my 2 daughters are late. How could you say that as a father and he said to me, `I am Sorry`.
He tried to explain but I was angry. I walked out of the hotel room with my kids and I didn’t go back to the hotel room until late at night when I was calm. Even though I got over it before we left Dubai, that can’t be erased from my mind. It is something that I think about when we are happy together, when we are cuddling, laughing, it keeps flashing to my mind. If he thinks I am lying, let him prove me wrong. He is not the only person he owes. He is obviously going to deny it.
But I am ready with proof. I believe everyman should take care of his children and wife. You are supposed to bring money for the kid’s welfare and how you get that is not the wife’s business since you are working. I know you as somebody working and not somebody living on a loan.
How come Yomi stayed with you for 10 months when he has his own flat
When I met Yomi, we started as friends and after 2 months we started dating. Before we started dating, we were always together and we had good times together. He is a very caring and nice man I can’t deny that. The only issue I have with Yomi is that he lies to me alot. He lied to his brother that I lost my granny. As a matter of fact, my granny died when I was 7years Old. That was when I didn’t even know what a relationship is or know I was going to meet Yomi Folawiyo.
Yomi lived with me for 10months after he told me that his wife was in London, I was living in my own place at Magodo. Though my parents also stayed in Magodo in Lagos. He said his wife, Ayomide’s mum and his mother didn’t like him. He told me all what he said they did to him. He said he ran away from her because of that and I said you have to go back because of your son and he said they are not in Nigeria.
He went to the extent of telling my brother My brother is very much alive and can testify to this. I was told not to marry him. I was told he has many girl friends and that he will leave me with time but I was seeing a loving and caring man. I was seeing a caring and down to earth man little did I know he was pretending. I didn’t see anything bad about him.
He was living with me and some of my siblings. It was during that time that I got pregnant. Initially I thought I had malaria only to find out that I was pregnant.
I didn’t want to keep the baby as I wasn’t so sure I wanted to marry him. He begged me saying he had only one child and also spoke about a failed IVF. He said he wanted the baby seeing it came out as the will of God. I am happy I kept the baby despite how he went about tarnishing my image. She is a blessed child and I thank God because she has remained a buddle of joy to me.
But there are stories flying around about the paternity of your daughter
I am not aware of that. On the issue of paternity, Yomi himself has never told me to my face that my daughter is not ours. He has never denied that it is not our daughter. It is just things I have been hearing around.
Why did you choose to pack out of the house as many marriages go through their ups and downs and women still stay in the marriage
I left because I had to move on with my life. I have 2 daughters and I have to move on so as to be there for them. My Life was in danger. Like I said he left the house 5 months ago. When he left, he was still calling the security at the gate, passing messages across to them. He will pass messages to the electrician, the security. At a point, the socket in the house started shocking me and shocked the children.
I have pictures and evidence of all these things. I took pictures of them. Even the kitchen had a naked wire that was left open. There were times I would be returning home from the shop at 5pm and the security would lock me out. I was going through so much drama and embarrassment.
The children were locked in once and they couldn’t go to school. My daughter wanted to do common entrance and her lesson teacher was locked outside for 5 months. When I called the Manager of the property to help us fix all the sockets, he said Oga said nobody should enter your flat. I was living in a Flat in Folawiyo Towers in Apapa and not a mansion.
He said Oga said we should not fix the socket in your flat, so I said to myself; I am no longer safe here. I have children, my daughter will want to charge her phone herself, which means that he deliberately wants to kill my kids and I. I am surprised that Yomi could say to an online publication that he ran for his dear Life in an online interview.
For instance, ever since I knew Yomi, he had always had Hypertension and Diabetes; This can be proven by his medical history at the hospitals he visits. He has been claiming that he had Hypertension and Diabetes through me. He has had them for over 14years even when I was not in the picture.
The records are there in his hospital at St Nicholas and Reddington and Yomi himself told me he has had Stroke twice even when his Dad was alive. He said he was taken to Redddington and when it didn’t work out, he was flown to London. I have slept on the floor of Reddington Hospital before. That was when he was hospitalised. There are lots of people with Hypertension and Diabetes all over the world but they live a healthy Life style. The reason I always quarrel with Yomi is because he has refused to stop drinking and smoking.
I have tried to curb and even go as far as praying and fasting for him. This is somebody I love so much and I should be able to go the extra mile for him. But Yomi will go and sit down at the Navy Bar and Lagoon Bar in Apapa from 2pm to 10pm at night. Sometimes people will call me to come and take him home.
Even his Mobile policeman called me once and said Madam, Madam Oga drove himself and I said where is the driver and he said the driver got a call that his wife put to bed. I told him to send me an address and I called a cab man at 10.30pm to drive them home. This happens like every other time.
Why didn’t you try to help him out
I have tried times without number. I have gone to his hospital at Reddington, and I have tried to reach out to the family. Like when this problem started, I tried to reach out to his sister, and she said I should have known the kind of person Yomi is before I married him and why am I complaining now. I said he changed when I first met him and I didn’t know he was still going to change again. I tried to change him. He actually changed when we got married to me. He stopped drinking and smoking and that was why I could get pregnant. The main reason why we fight is just because of his drinking and smoking habits. He takes loans from people when there’s nothing he want to do with it.
What relationship do you have with the Folawiyo`s
I have a perfect relationship, I don’t have any problem with the Folawiyo`s. Me as a person think they are nice people. I am happy to have been part of the Folawiyo`s Dynasty. I am happy I have a daughter for the family. I have never had issue with any of them. They have never treated me badly.
Even though Yomi told me they said he should not marry me and warned him about me. The problem I have is with Yomi. When I had my baby, they were there for me. Mrs Johnson wanted to take care of the naming; she wanted to take care of everything. She cooked for me for few days.
She brought fresh fish and gave me a cheque after naming. Uncle Tunde was not around but he sent Mosunmola beautiful Gucci, Channel among other designers to her from abroad. Even his wife was not left out. They all showered me with love and care. The family has been nice, even Uncle Lanre bought all the Champagne we used for the naming. Even his sisters, Motunde, Labisi, Aminat are all nice people and they love me while I love and hold them in high esteem.
What kind of wedding did you do with him
We had a court wedding in Ikoyi Registry on the 3rd of December, 2011 and I was happy to be married to him but it’s just quite unfortunate how things turned out.
Have you tried to call him to see how he is faring
I have tried getting in touch with him. When he sees my calls he ignores it and sometimes switches off his phone. I have sent people to him and there was no way I could reach him. At one point, I was fighting the Manager of the Estate, Mr Kehinde Lasisi. I told him, he always knows where Yomi is because he is always the one he sent to the house. He sends you to Nanny to bring some of his clothes. I said, have you seen Yomi and he said he hasn’t. I searched for him several times and it was always futile effort. I also got in touch with Mrs Johnson who said she calls and he doesn’t pick up.
Don’t you think maybe you are the cause of his problems. Some say he has problems with your flamboyant life style of been on Instagram all the time showing off
Well before he left the house, he was always complaining about my pictures on Instagram and Facebook, even though I am private on Facebook I am so much private on Instagram.It is just because of the kind of job I do. I am into Skincare, I am into Fashion. I also like to dress in a way women can see and like what I wear. Even older people dress in lovely ways. My husband is one of those kind of people that don’t understand the social media.
The social media platform has helped me and my business so much. I have been able to use it to reach out to many beyond the shore of Nigeria. So I don’t know why life is funny and people in it are funny as well. Even when you dress in a very funny and haggard way people will complain about you. If you are very attractive, people will still complain.
Many believe you are controversial
I don’t believe I am controversial as the only issue that has brought me into bad press was just of late that my marriage to Yomi began to have issues. I have always been scandal free and people know this and know what I stand for. I think people like what they see and they don’t understand why someone will be shining so much. Some might like me and just be pretending because they don’t know how to come to me.
They probably have a problem with my looking good. People come to my instagram page and some of them will be painting what has never happened. People should learn not to judge from afar.
Who is the real Bimbo Kashamu
The real Bimbo is a prayerful person. Forget all the glamorous side to me. Those who know me will tell you that Bimbo is a prayer warrior. God doesn’t look at your physical being but spiritual being. I am a very loving person and I love fashion so much. My Dad loves Fashion, My mum loves fashion. I grew up with families who love fashion. My mother is a fabric merchant and she has done it for 27years.
My family has revolved around fashion. I grew up seeing my Mum looking nice in a good cloth, shoe, and elegant. So I look at her and see a gorgeous woman. She loves fashion and she is very social. My sisters are like that as well. I don’t think there is anything bad in looking so gorgeous and glamorous.
Funny enough, even when you are looking dirty and unkempt, people will still hate you. So it is good when you do what makes you happy. I get very happy when I look good. Lots of my clients are happy when they see my look for the day and it brings a lots of client to my brand. Those who have beef with me are people who probably want to be like me. They want to be like me.
Yoruba culture believes that when you are no longer in your matrimonial home, your marriage is no longer intact. What is the stage of your marriage now
I ran for my life as I am the one who has been receiving threat messages and calls. People will call and threaten me that if I say anything, they will deal with me. I want to stop being his wife, it is better for us to separate.
Don’t you think you can settle this issue amicably
There is no way I don’t want to be Yomi Folawiyo`s wife anymore. I have been through so much with him. I have fought him to change his ways. I have made him see what he can achieve with his fathers name but he doesn’t want that. Before now, there was also a rumour that I was thrown out of the house, when I was still in the house trying to make peace.
Virtually all women go through a lot in marriage and they still wait in it to make it work, one would have expected that you stay to make it work
Lots of women all over the world are going through domestic violence in their marriage and still stay in it but I have to be strong for my daughters. Many suffer and because they are scared, they keep dying in silence.
I decided to take that bold step because I don’t want to die in silence and lose my kids. I WANT TO BE THE ONE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM. i CANT STAND ALL THE LIES, AND FALSE ALLEGATION. I pray that he finds that woman that will love him and be there for him. No matter what he has done, I wish him well. I don’t want to be killed by my husband. One can see the case of Arowolo, I don’t want something bad to happen to me so it is better to go our separate ways.
Do you see yourself taking a shot at marriage again
May God see me through this, I have moved out of his house and I am trying to get over the trauma and distress that I have gone through. I just want to settle down and take care of my kids and my business.
Is there any room for reconciliation
No There is no room for any reconciliation. It is over.
City People Magazine
